Dear Abysal, I said that I forgot what I was going to say. I lied, I didn't forget. I just didn't feel comfortable saying it in public like that. I feel more comfortable putting my thoughts in this format. It's as if they belong here, in a single wall of text that you can read over and over. And it remains stagnant. You don't need to be constantly thinking about how to respond to it. I was originally going to put this as the footer of blog post #37, but I decided against it, since it'd be too public. The footers use this sorta hidden formatting when I say much more self-deprecating or obscure thoughts. The blog posts themselves are a layer deeper than what I usually get in regular conversations. These footers, and therefore this letter, are a layer deeper yet, heh. So yeah, what I wanted to tell you is in relation to this: "but another part knows what wrong humans do to the world and each other by staying here second by second" "and it feels like dying is the right thing to do" Link back to the conversation. It isn't a thought I have on my head all of the time... but it does sit in the back of my mind. And I don't want to be misunderstood. I don't want to kill myself. I don't want to be killed either. I don't want to become a sacrifice, a martyr who fought for the end of humanity's corruption, evil and wrongdoings. I want to see humanity crumble first. I want to make sure that every single human being is gone, dealt with, as if a plague it were, because a plague it is. And I want as much pain as can be humanely and inhumanely possible to be inflicted on humanity during the process. And how come I haven't carried out this plan? How come I haven't started to work towards this goal? Because I'm not fucking stupid. There are laws put in place that stop would stop me on my feet if I did as little as raise a knife in front of somebody. But in the face of impunity? Oh, I would be more than glad to start it. And I would figure out a way of achieving it, of cleaning this earth, of removing each human, ignoring how long it would take. You say that us humans want to protect children. I do consider it as well to be the fact that they are helpless. Their bodies too weak and fragile. And of course, their minds too innocent. They do not know, they have not been subjected to the evils of humanity, to how selfish and corrupt they are. But in the case of removing all humans, would this really matter? Sure, we can retain some sort of morality and let them enjoy their childhood and their growth. But this would only delay the process. Besides, the very act of killing is immoral, so we're already ditching morals to achieve this goal. And even worse, we'd let the children become adults, grow stronger, and also organize themselves against you. Would you really want to allow that? Would you really let some opposition grow right under your nose, let them become more powerful and give them the chance to overthrow you? ... But again, this is not what I think all of the time. I still have some human decency in my brain. My wrinkly, human brain. Human. How I despise being one. Crescent Moon. November 4th, 2024.